crash out
nothing was happening, so I decided to finally crash out instead of doing something definitive that I would regret later, and now I feel I should have just done it anyway because this is worse.
met one of those people that show up in your life and turn it completely upside down just with their presence, and I am obsessed. but now I've been really trying to avoid them because I hate myself too much to even be around them, and I really don't want to hurt them if I finally make it happen.